I’m a 23-year-old single black female. I live alone with a cat. I have no “real” friends, just acquaintances. The last time I had a date was 1995, the last time I got laid was back in 1993. It’s 1999 and I’m beginning to think there’s something wrong with me.
I don’t know if the “bliss” I feel right now from my complete isolation will become a deep depression in time. I don’t have the answers and wonder if you can point me in the right direction. –Girl Meets Boy
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It’s not often I recommend a shrink, but in your case I’m going to make an exception: GMB, you need to get yourself to a head doctor. It’s one thing to live alone in blissful isolation; it’s quite another to be friendless and violently angry at any man who expresses an interest in you. Reading your letter, I got the sneaking feeling that more is at stake for you during your interactions with men than the simple enjoyment of your solitude. The anger you feel is out of proportion to the offense, and your disgust with men and everything they’re about seems, oh, a teensy-weensy bit psychotic.
I went over to his place for a date. I assumed we wouldn’t have sex, but we started to get into it. I didn’t bring any condoms, and he didn’t have any, so we couldn’t do “the deed.” There are many other things we could do that were hot, and I tried everything short of riding him bareback (I won’t do that), but he was really disappointed about not getting fucked. His disappointment turned me off, and I couldn’t get myself to come. So we stroked ourselves in silence, he came, and I gave up.
Talking to my circle of friends, they all agreed that it was too weird or disgusting to have a parental unit copulating in their offspring’s sleeping space. I told my dad how I felt and asked him how he would feel if I had my girlfriend over and we stayed in his bed. He took it as a rude comment and now the situation isn’t discussed. While I’ve had other couples stay in my bed, I don’t seem to mind as long as it’s not my father. Am I being selfish? –Pothead
