Hey, Faggot:
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Does this make me an awful person? I feel rotten and racist, especially because of how upset my boyfriend was. He didn’t say one thing in the car on the way home, and I was sitting there imagining him locked up. So is this a racist thing or just a fantasy? I’ve always thought that if you had a desire and you confronted it, it would go away. I’m sure my boyfriend would be happy to oblige in a bondage fantasy, but how manipulative is that? He wouldn’t know that I would really be fantasizing that it was 150 years ago and he was my slave. If he did something like that to me, I would feel betrayed and hurt. What should I do?
Hey, BB:
I am a married female with a high-stress job. Often I feel that my husband does not understand the pressures that I face, but our marriage is solid and loving. Despite the fact that I was not seeking an extramarital relationship, I became attracted to a man I met through my job. The feeling seems to be mutual, although he is not relationship material. My question is this: What are your thoughts regarding short-term affairs undertaken solely to explore the sexual possibilities between two people–people who do not want to upset their relationships with others? (He has a girlfriend.) I feel terrible for even considering this, but when I put my guilt feelings aside, I have to acknowledge that I would really like to check out what this guy has to offer in bed. –Happily Married but Curious
–Hot and Obsessed by Masculine Obscenities
Send questions to Savage Love, Chicago Reader, 11 E. Illinois, Chicago 60611.
